if any of you can read chinese by any chance....i do have one
if any of you can read chinese by any chance....i do have one
to redemption2:
i just read a part of your fanfic and i find it to be quite a pleasant read too
but there are some things that i'm not so comfortable with,
first, the japanese phrases are distracting at best, i agree with the others that it might be better to remove them
i also agree with twh in that some scene dividing tool would be a good improvement
some jokes are quite good and put a smile on my face, but most of the time i find them misplaced or not that funny, but then again, as said before, humor is very complicated and difficult to get right
and last but not least, i think it's great you introduced the new character, Adam, but sometimes his participation feels too forced and his actions too unbelievable,
in my opinion you gave him too much skill and assests (used in combat) at the start,
after reading some of the later chapters you wrote i get the feeling he's becoming more leveled out,
don't get me wrong i'm not crushing your efforts or setting the very paper you write on on fire (in a manner of speech) but these are just some things that i think are open for improvement, of course it's totally up to you to decide what to do with it
Love is fiction, misery is my only friend
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